Tuesday, September 27, 2005

A story (??) I heard.....

Here I am waiting for the cab after work last night and I meet this friend of mine who is working in another process......

The first thing he does is make a joke about carrying a book to read always....but you guys know what can happen when travelling in a cab of "upper-storey-vacant" people!!! Anyways, we talk about other things and it finally comes to a place in the conversation where he says that he got caught at home for drinking....as in getting really drunk. I really wish I can reproduce the conversations in the colloquial language that we used......its kinda more interesting that way.

He said that he had gone to a friends place for an overnight stay to have a drink. He has a family function to attend the next day. One led to another and he ends up drinking a whole lotta whisky. Not to be finished with that, he goes on to have a little beer and a little wine. (Don't ask how that is all going to go down in the stomach!). Then someone suggests that beer and wine mixed together is great and he goes for that. Finally, after a whole lotta drinking, he has a wink for an hour - this is at 5 in the morning. His friends give him valuable advise saying that if he has a bath in cold water, he's never going to have a hangover and all will be fine.....all will be fine as you will soon read....

He takes his friends' advise, goes home, has a cold shower. All seems to be fine when he is in there, but once he comes out, he realises that he has suddenly acquired double vision. To the unititiated, this is vision you get when you are highly intoxicated and hungover. You can see double of everything. Why I explain this in detail is because it is going to turn out as an important part of the story.

Still hungover, his friends drop him off at his aunt's house. He slinks in (or staggers in, I imagine) and stealthily locates a place where people cannot see him. But alas!, his grandmom comes and sits next to him and starts talking about the whole family thing. Bored and seeing quadruple from all that family talk, he makes small talk with some people around. He gets to know that what he is actually attending is a naming ceremony and that the name is Krishna Prasad. He does not seem to notice their quite disgusted faces....probably due to the smell of alchohol on his breath.

He manages to get out of the function and go home. His folks come in after some time and he asks his mom a very innocent question considering the circumstances.
"Why ma, have they given two names for one boy?"
His mom is thunderstruck. I think at this point she gives him a nice twist of his ear and says - "Son, that was not one boy. They are twins!!!"

Well, now you know why the double vision was so important!! The story does not end there, it goes on where he is given a thorough blasting by his mom and dad....but thats the boring part!!

Thursday, September 22, 2005

4 posts in a day??

Man, 4 posts in a day!! Fuck, something happened on the way to office!!

Omerta - short story

I looked her in the eye. A tear rolled down her cheek. I felt so sad to let her go like that. We were so close all these years. She went flying off the cliff, crashed and died. I walked to the waiting car. You break Omerta, even if you are my lover, you die!!



Well, that was not so great, but felt like writing a short story all the same. Man, I love killing all the people in my stories. Hope you do not end up in mine!!!

Just wanted to tag some people this time......Anwin once again, Karthik once again, Samuel (wanna see how that comes out!!!), Sanjeeb (dude, use spellcheck!! heehe), Manjusha and Anamika Anyone....

Sidey??

I am reading the collected short stories of Jeffrey Archer on my way to office in the cab. It has some great short tales in it, always with a twist in the end!!! But otherwise normal talk on my cab when I come to office:

She: Wow, did u see that dance that *&#*($ did on the (*(*(*(* function??
She1: Yeah, she did a great number....
She: True, did seem a little too explicit though
She1: Yeah, a little too much exposure, but the crowd was sidey!!!

I am like thunderstruck!!!! Man, how can you talk both ways like that?? I mean, I understand that the crowd was sidey and that is sick. They must have hooted and screamed. But really, if you do a dance like that, so much so that even a girl thouught it was a little too much, what else do you expect. Women reading this will atonce say that I am sexist. But I say, just tell me......this is crazy!!

Spam!!!!

Spam, in whatever fucking format and however well disguised it is, is just that - TRASH!!! You dont need to be a great thinker or brilliant to know a spam mail when you get one. So I was amazed when I was forwarded this spam-mail in my company email!!!

Man, the people who think up such shit and even worse, the people who FORWARD such shit, must be shot.....( read through the mail........it says you will have to wait for something amazing once you forward it to other people.....)....the people who wait for this to happen, well, they ought not to be here, they can wait for the Rapture or Armageddon...........or BOTH!!

And they have the impunity or are ignorant enough to add their confidentiality notices at the bottom of these forwards.....check it out.......





hi all,

A big hello to you guys, forward this to at least 11 people and see what happens on your screen. You will laugh your head off!!!!!!!!!!!

If you forward it to 11 people a video comes on your screen. This works. I don't know how...but it works.
Somehow, from the return path generated, you'll receive something, and IT IS FUNNY!!!

This is The coolest thing I have ever gotten. All you have to do is send it to 11 people and watch your screen.
It is the funniest clip. Almost fell off my chair!!! So, send it to those 11 people and watch.

ps: it is really true. Pass it around.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Monday, September 12, 2005

Sociopath!!

Took an online test...call it whatever you may....got this as a result!!!


Sociopath
You are 100% Rational, 42% Extroverted, 71% Brutal, and 57% Arrogant.
You are the Sociopath! As a result of your cold, calculating rationality, your introversion (and ability to keep quiet), your brutality, and your arrogance, you would make a very cunning serial killer. You care very little for the feelings of others, possibly because you are not a very emotional person. You are also very calculating and intelligent, making you a perfect criminal mastermind. Also, you are a very arrogant person, tending to see yourself as better than others, providing you a strong ability to perceive others as weak little animals, thus making it easier to kill them. In short, your personality defect is the fact that you could easily be a sociopath, because you are calculating, unemotional, brutal, and arrogant. Please don't kill me for writing mean things about you!

To put it less negatively:

1. You are more RATIONAL than intuitive.

2. You are more INTROVERTED than extroverted.

3. You are more BRUTAL than gentle.

4. You are more ARROGANT than humble.

Compatibility:

Your exact opposite is the Hippie.

Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Spiteful Loner, the Smartass, and the Capitalist Pig.

*

*

If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.

The other personality types:

The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.


Take the test yourself.....here.....

Got this from Samuel

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Story - 55 words

Well, I was tagged by Anwin to write a story with 55 words. He has tagged Karthik too. I have finished. Here's mine..........

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two guns

The gun reflected the sunlight. One bullet. My last.

I spin the chamber. White Pony puts the gun against his temple, calmly pulls. Spins chamber. I pick up the gun, put it against my head, pull the trigger. Blood splatters on the table, his. My other guns smoking. Could not take the pressure, you see.

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Up YOURS!!!

And you have the balls to call us uncivilised?? You stupid, uncivilised BARBARIANS!!!

Click......

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Impossible is....nothing!!

Well, seems such a corny subject line......

But finally, me and Renie met up in Chennai after I think, close to 4 years!! Man, its incredible to know that the last time I met up with Renie in Chennai was when I was in college and doing my last semester project there. At that time, I was staying with Anoop and we went on an adventure of the day when we went looking for Renie's place...quite outside the city. That was the last time I met Renie in Chennai....

Well, I made quite some trips there after that, but I never got to meet him there after that. This was partly due to him being very busy (ahem) or me going there on other work and not able to meet him. I know that he is gonna kick me for saying that, but its the truth dude!!

Well, anyway, this time I decided I gotta meet up.....and made a bold start fearing his familiar RedTape shoes...I reach Chennai, call him on his cell and I hear the familiar tone saying that the users phone is switched off!! Well, I think I can call him sometime in the evening and laze around at my sisters place, doing nothing....it becomes evening, Renie is still having his cell switched off!! Makes me think that he is upto something really fishy there....But then I send an SMS to Anwin to get his address if possible. But he send me his home number, no address. I call on that number, but again, no one picks up. Sly bastard, he says he did not get any calls on the landline on that day!! Hmmm.......

Finally I send him another SMS asking where he is and forget all about it....Finally he calls me sometime at night saying that he had forgotten all about me going there. All said and done, we decide to go to Geoffrey's. I get introduced to Pallavi and Martin on the way. We go there, get introduced to Vivian and O'Connor. No, thats not his name, I guess!! I get bored with the lousy music being played there and the freaks dancing around like whacko chacko!!

Then, just when we think of leaving, we are pulled into a fight with one of these crazy characters and it nearly comes to a fist fight. But anyway, a cut of 20% on the bill was not too great. Leaving from that place, we land up in Vivians for a game of Taboo. Winning does not matter you know, its all in taking part!! Yeah, yeah my team lost!! Big deal....

Finally we go to Renie's house and watch "The Bourne Supremacy"....really good except that I was very sleepy and crash...Come back to my sisters place the next day afternoon..

All in all, a very good Chennai trip....nice meeting you dude.....

Chennai was freaking hot, humid.....but still the roads are better than Bangalore and also traffic, though heavy, never jams up...

Got back to work yesterday....

Friday, September 02, 2005

Horrorscope!!


Was forwarded this amazing set of hororscopes by Sanjeeb...

Saw that Anwin has put it up on his blog, well, mine is a real horrorscope, but will still put it up here..