Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Bumper Stickers

Just came across some Bumper Stickers on a site....thought I would share them here with you guys....the ones I love are in bold.

Keep on working, millions on welfare depend on you!

I didn't climb to the top of the food chain to become a vegetarian!

Alcohol and calculus don't mix. DON'T DRINK AND DERIVE!

So many stupid people, and so few asteroids.

My wife says I should get up and go to work, but the voices in my head say I should stay home and clean my guns.

The generation of random numbers is too important to leave to chance.

I don't think, therefore I am not.

Say "NO" to drugs. That will bring the prices down.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

Double your drive space. Delete Windows.

I'm Canadian. It's like being American, but without the gun.

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

The meek shall inherit the earth, after we're through with it.

If you believe in telepathy, think about honking.

People like you are the reason people like me need medication.

Every time you open your mouth, some idiot starts talking.

The box said Windows 2000 or better. So I installed Linux.

Use the best: Linux for servers, Mac for graphics, Windows for Solitaire.

I found Jesus - he was behind the sofa all the time.

So many cats, so few recipes.

Rock is dead. Long live paper and scissors.

I don't have a beer gut, I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs.

To err is human, to blame it on somebody else shows management potential.

Procrastinate now.

The last time politics and religion were mixed, people were burned at the stake.

Rehab is for quitters.

My dog can lick anyone!

The trouble with life is there's no background music.

Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research.

Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.

Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 30 years.

Allow me to introduce my selves.

Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.

Getting on your feet means getting off your butt.

I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.

I used to be schizophrenic, but we're OK now.

I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.

Anything not worth doing is not worth doing well.

Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to ME.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

Life would be easier if I had the source code.

I said "no" to drugs, but they didn't listen.

Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

Don't drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink.

God is my co-pilot, but the Devil is my bombardier.

Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.

My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her (or something like that).

Sure you can trust the government! Just ask a native American!

Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!

Driver carries no cash. He's married.

If I get you advantage, can I take drunk of you?

I doubt, therefore I might be.

There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary, and those who don't.

Thank God I'm an atheist.

Vegetarian: Indian word for lousy hunter.

Squirrels: Nature's speed bumps.


  1. Chaos, panic and disorder. My work here is done.

  2. im not cynical.everything just sucks

  3. I know about freedom of speech and all that crap....and i totally am for it....but you can so easily sign up on for a blogger id. Please sign up, create a fictitious it Satan if you want - but PLEASE do not post anonymously!! I will be forced to not let ppl comment anonymously....

  4. how sad roy....... ill tink abt the name.....

  5. Yea dude.. good ones... I liked most of them.


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